So earlier I posted about having regained 13 llbs. I did well in losing 7 of those llbs and found I was quite happy there at 10st 10llbs. I kept at that weight for quite some time... or so I thought! Every single day my digital scales said the same thing 10 10... I was happy that I had found my weight. I was able to eat healthily but not to worry too much about recording and weighing my food, I was managing my weight just fine! Then it struck me, can I really be the same weight every day! surely there would be some fluctuation and my clothes are a little tight! So I asked my husband to step on the scales, wouldnt you know it... 10 10!!! nooooooo!!! my scales were broken! stuck on 10 10. I could not bare the thought of how much I could have regained so it took a little while to pluck up the courage to go out and get a new set of scales. When I did, to my horror I was 11st 6llbs, a regain of 10llbs! I felt absolutley disgusted with myself. How could I let this happen again. I have gone back to recording everything in my fitness pal, monitoring my cals carbs and protein and with exercise netting no more than 1200 calories per day. I have lost 9llbs, one more to goal but 3 more would be good to have some kind of leighway. So what have I learned this time, on my second regain. I have learned that my weight needs constant monitoring, and that I have the control over it. If I could only turn back time 10 years and look at my weight on the scales and think, I am not having this I will lose it! then maybe I would never have got myself in this position in the first place. I realise that I will never have the kind of body that will be able to eat what I want, I will always have to watch what I eat and how much exercise I do. But what I do know now more than ever is that I can. It just takes a little will power.
NEW NSV
About 4 years ago I was in a queue in a shop with my niece who tried to give me a cuddle. She then quite loudly said, 'Auntie, you are so fat, I cant get my arms around you' I was so so embarrassed and hurt. But what she said was true, there was no avoiding this. That day I spent with my niece was an eye opener. We walked to the shops and back and then sat in the garden at my brothers house. I was too tired to play any games with her. I so longed to be able to run around with her. Well a couple of weeks ago we went for a weekend away to Torquay and we found a hill which together we run up and together we rolled down, over and over again. It was so much fun, I had so much energy and we laughed so much. I loved being able to play with her, especially when I think that if this journey had not happend for me I would have more than likely been in a wheelchair by now. I love been healthy and full of energy and I will see my beautiful little niece turn into a beautiful lady.
